


Blinded By My Own Reflection

by hidden_messages



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-29
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2018-01-17 11:48:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1386538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hidden_messages/pseuds/hidden_messages
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek Hale; emotionally stunted individual</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blinded By My Own Reflection

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FireFoxAxel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FireFoxAxel/gifts).



ALONE. YES, THAT’S THE KEY WORD, THE MOST AWFUL WORD IN THE ENGLISH TONGUE. MURDER DOESN’T HOLD A CANDLE TO IT AND HELL IS ONLY A POOR SYNONYM.

Stephen King  **—**

 

Derek used to feel the grief every now and then; it hit him like a freight train at a hundred miles an hour. Clearly werewolf healing is limited to just the physical wounds, for the mental scars from the fire still remain. He knows he handles it better than Peter, whom he still doesn’t trust fully or particularly like but Derek just has to deal with Peter and his several brands of crazy. And despite all the shit Derek’s dealt with, and becoming an alpha of all things, the tint of loneliness remained; even when his betas are filled his loft with their teenage hormones.

There was only one other Derek could feel he could relate to, and that was Stiles. The curious teenager who had attached himself to Derek like an extra limb, and the funny thing was Derek doesn’t want to lose him.

His constant chatter was simultaneously the best and the worst thing Derek has ever encountered in his life, and he’s lived with Peter. But he’s lost his Mum and knows full well what it feels like on those days where Scott swans in with Isaac glued to his side and a box of his Mum’s cookies in the other. He feels the loss, the loneliness, and the bright smile that falters just for a second.

Sometimes there were days where Derek ran his betas just a little too hard in training, the pain of being alone getting to him just a little, and Stiles would wander over, scolding him under his breath.

Derek used to wonder if Stiles felt alone.

Sometimes when Derek continues to press his betas, Stiles would attack him with a thick stick, which Derek will snap between his fingers like a twig; providing a dash of much needed rest for the betas, and a glance at Stiles’ hidden smile for Derek. Before turning back to smirk and the panting betas Stiles will lightly punch his shoulder, and Derek pretended not to notice the little skip in Stiles’ heartbeat.

The days rolled on. Derek watched, didn’t smile, pretended not to care.

Pretended not to feel alone.

He watched irritating boy become a teacher of the supernatural in his own right. Derek knows how much he relies on Stiles on almost everything, and that’s borderline stupid, but he can’t help it.

Then when Stiles gets used as bait again he was at the end of his tether. It’s like they understood the things Derek didn’t back then. They knew Derek would do anything, and Derek didn’t know why. All he could feel was relief seep into his bones as Stiles smiled weakly at his rescue.

When Stiles was asleep in the spare room at the loft Erica curled up into his side and told him he was stupid. That he wouldn’t feel so alone if he could accept what he felt, and that made him angry because he just didn’t know.

But Erica just sat and talked. So Derek just sat and listened, wondering whether his betas were getting quicker or he was getting slower.

Erica smiled when she knew Derek understood, when the flicker of understanding appeared in his eyes. So she patted his leg and left, whilst Derek wondered if it were possible not to feel alone.

Soon enough tentative words turn into tentative kisses.

The constant teasing from his pack should annoy Derek but it doesn’t, instead he just holds onto Stiles tighter. Who kisses him soundly and calls Derek his stalking sourwolf, but he doesn’t mind (and leaves his window open just a little wider).

He calls Derek his boyfriend which makes Derek smile, and calls him his knight in shining armour.

And Stiles is, well he’s wonderful.

**Author's Note:**

> Happy birthday Emma <3
> 
> sirpeterhale.tumblr.com


End file.
